Attack of the Growling Eyeballs (Who Shrunk Daniel Funk?)

Attack of the Growling Eyeballs (Who Shrunk Daniel Funk?)

Daniel Funk always wanted a brother, but he’s got three sisters instead. Until he shrinks to the size of a toe—and discovers Pablo, his twin brother who’s always that small! Together, they have mountains of tiny-size fun. In Attack of the Growling Eyeballs, they release a hissing cockroach at one of their sister’s slumber party and learn that tiny-size trouble can cause mega-size danger. In Escape of the Mini-Mummy, Daniel enters the school diorama contest against Vince the Pizza Prince. Pablo comes along, disguised as a toilet-papered mummy. Can Pablo help Daniel win big, or will he create big-time Egyptian chaos? Lin Oliver is the author of the Who Shrunk Daniel Funk series, and the co-author, with Henry Winkler, of the bestselling Hank Zipzer series. She is a writer and producer of movies, books, and television series for children and families. The co-founder and executive director of the Society of Children's Book Writers and Illustrators, she lives in Los Angeles with her husband and sons. Visit her at linoliver.com. Stephen Gilpin graduated from the NYC School of Visual Arts where he studied painting and cartooning. He is the illustrator of the Who Shrunk Daniel Funk series and The Extraordinary Adventures of Ordinary Boy series. Stephen currently lives in Hiawatha, Kansas. Visit him at SGilpin.com. Attack of the Growling Eyeballs By Lin Oliver Simon & Schuster Children's Publishing Copyright © 2009 Lin Oliver All right reserved. ISBN: 9781416909583 CHAPTER 1 The Funkster's Funky Fact #1: Americans eat 350 slices of pizza per second. It all started with the pizza. "Daniel! I'm ordering," my sister Robin said, sticking her head into my room. "What do you want?" I was sitting in my La-Z-Boy, playing a quick round of predinner video games. "Triple sausage, double pepperoni, and meatball," I muttered without looking up from the screen. "Ever heard the word vegetable?" Robin asked, speed dialing Village Pizza on her cell. "Ever heard the word meat lover?" I answered. I wasn't going to let her lay that "Vegetarians rule" attitude on me. She came in and flopped herself down on my bed, then shot up really fast when she realized she had flopped herself right onto my sweaty baseball jersey. "Daniel, you are so gross!" she screamed. "Hey, can I help it if I have overactive armpits?" I said, firing the word armpit right into her face to really gross her out. She got even, though. "Hello, Village Pizza?" she said into her hot pink cell phone which I truly believe grows out of her left ear. "This is Robin Funk at 344 Pacific Lane. We'd like a large veggie pizza, hold the cheese. Oh, and extra tomatoes." Here's a tip: If you have an older sister, never let her order the pizza. You'll wind up getting nothing but salad on a crust. It's a known fact that females order four times more vegetable toppings than guys. "You left out the meat!" I hollered, lunging for Robin's phone. But good old Robin, being the star of the eighth-grade volleyball team, has quick reflexes, which meant she escaped into the hall before I could grab her cell. I popped out of the chair and bolted after her, running smack into one of my other sisters, Lark. She was walking down the hall with her Web cam, shooting a boring segment for her boring video blog that no one watches because it's so...well...boring. Did I mention it was boring? "Daniel, do you have anything to say to the camera?" Lark turned and focused her egg-shaped mini Web cam on me. I got real close to the lens and stuck my tongue out. I'm not proud of it, but I confess, I actually licked the lens. Check that out, bloggy girls! "Eeuuww, you stink!" my little sister Goldie said as she shoved by me on the way from the bathroom to her room. "I hope you're planning to take a shower before dinner," Robin chimed in. Wow, this was turning into a "Let's criticize Daniel" session, like always. "It's stupid to shower before dinner," I answered. "My face will just get all dirty again." "Most humans eat by putting food in their mouths and not on their faces," Lark said, moving the camera around so she was shooting her own face talking. I guess she wanted her audience, all two of them, to see her being a ninth-grade know-it-all. I went back in my room, closed the door, and took a deep breath. Thank goodness there were no girls there. I live with two teenage sisters, one younger one, one mom, one grandmom, and one great-grandmom. Our dog is female. So is the cat. Even our Siamese fighting fish is a girl. If you ask me, and I know you didn't, that's a lot of girls in one house. Way too many. I climbed back into my La-Z-Boy, reclined to the medium position, and burped. Sure, it smelled a little like Granny Nanny's goulash, which I had eaten cold as a postbaseball snack. But I didn't mind. I was glad to be alone in my room where a guy can enjoy his own body odors in peace. That's when it happened. Bamo-slamo, just like that. You know how your stomach growls when you're really